Mister Brisbane: Ship-shape
Forget the Elephant | Views on news | Time warp | Everywhere man
The opening of Brisbane’s new cruise terminal — which will finally allow big ships to dock properly in the River City — was supposed to happen on October 3. Now it won’t happen until at least December 17. The reason for this is, as you might expect, the fact that no cruise ships are operating in Australian waters because of the coronavirus. P&O’s Pacific Dawn was supposed to be the first ship to use the terminal, and its new sister ship, Pacific Encounter, is scheduled to be based in Brisbane from the end of 2021. Ships from other fleets, including Princess and Royal Caribbean — which planned to base Radiance of the Seas in Brisbane from November this year — are also expected to use the facility.
But when the cruise ships do arrive, passengers may face a confronting smell due to the port’s proximity to the Luggage Point sewage treatment plant. If you’re wondering why that location was chosen, the Port of Brisbane website notes that Luggage Point “has naturally occurring deep water, enough space for them to ‘swing’ or turnaround, and does not have the same height restrictions for vessels as dictated by the bridges further upstream”. As for the stench? The port authority says: “We have … developed a solution that has been proven to mitigate odour issues associated with the nearby waste water treatment facility, which will be deployed on days that ships call to Luggage Point and the wind conditions are unfavourable.” I understand it involves an industrial-sized can of Glen 20.
Join Brett Debritz and Spencer Howson for the Mister Brisbane show on Reading Radio at 1296AM or DAB+ in Brisbane on Tuesdays at 6.30pm, Wednesdays at 2pm and Saturdays at 7.15am. It is also available as a podcast on popular platforms including Spotify, Apple and Google Podcasts.
A MATTER OF TRUST
Whose news do you choose? While Channel 7 leads nationally, Channel 9 has already claimed the crown of leading news service in Queensland for 2020. In a media release, the station states:
“9News Queensland now has an unassailable lead in the ratings after winning 21 weeks, of the 40-week survey period, 13 more than Seven News, Monday to Friday 6.00-7.00pm, for an overall average audience of 209,500 in comparison to 202,700 for Seven News. 9NewsMonday to Friday 6.00-7.00pm boasts a Total People Share of 39.1 per cent to 37.8 per cent for Seven News. Presented by Andrew Lofthouse and Melissa Downes, 9News Queensland has proven to be the bulletin local viewers rely on in times of crisis, from the devastating floods and bushfires to the unprecedented coronavirus pandemic.”
I’m wondering why people watch a particular news service: is it because they like the newsreaders, they like the selection of stories, they think the product is better overall or they simply trust one over the other? The again, maybe it’s because they liked the show before the news and were too lazy to change the channel. Or it’s just a habit that’s hard to kick.
P.S. On the subject of TV news, Media Watch points out that Brisbane viewers to Channel 10’s First at Five might be getting pre-recorded news, meaning it might be first but it could be out of date. Sadly, this is nothing new for Queenslanders. When daylight saving kicks in again, many shows including Sunrise, Today and The Project are on an hour delay. In our fast-paced world a lot can happen in 60 minutes.
NAME GAME
The management of the Elephant Hotel in Fortitude Valley have announced on Facebook that the pub is being re-renamed The Prince Consort. “That’s right, our stunning 132-year-old heritage-listed site will be reclaiming its original name in all its former glory. We’ll be taking a little down time to spruce up the old gal, and returning as an entertainment destination with something for everyone including live music, DJs, pub trivia and everything in-between.” As a former denizen of the Valley, I can confirm that the Consort was the scene of a lot of interesting activity, especially in pre-Fitzgerald Inquiry times. It was a hang-out for what we euphemistically referred to as “colourful Valley identities”. If only the walls could talk.
Meanwhile, I’m wondering which other old landmarks should return to their original names, or which institutions should be revived. Would the city benefit if the York, National and Carlton hotel brands were re-established, or if department stores such as Bayards, Penneys, Finneys, Waltons, Allan and Stark’s, and McDonnell and East made a comeback? Speaking of Penneys, I did a Google search and discovered a Courier-Mail clipping on Trove. Dated May 8, 1936, it announces that an eight-storey retail “skyscraper” was to be built in Queen Street, but it turned out to be only four stories high. There’s also an advertisement for a men’s store called Overall’s, which was celebrating its 53rd birthday that year. Are any other blasts from the past worth remembering?
Penneys, Queen Street (Image: Brisbane City Council)
DAYS LIKE THESE
I was just reminded that, when he decided not to go to work, a former neighbour used to say he was “having one for the Queen”. I don’t believe I’ve heard this phrase from anyone else. I suppose it’s the equivalent of a “sickie” or maybe a “doona day”. Going down the rabbit hole, when I googled “sickie” the first offering was this definition: “A deranged, psychotic, or morbidly obsessed person.” I’d have thought that “sicko” was the most common slang term for that. But then I remembered somebody older than me saying that Australians used to refer to “commos” for communists, but we later adopted the American term “commies”.
MOST PECULIAR
Strange times can foster strange habits. The other day I needed to know the time, so I found myself looking at a clock that hasn’t worked for years. (As the old joke goes, it’s right twice a day — just not on this occasion). I also sometimes turn to look into a mirror that hasn’t been there for decades. Do others do this, or is there something wrong with me?
Meanwhile, the house is full of paper towel rolls. This is a consequence not of deliberate hoarding, but the manner in which I do the online supermarket order. When there are specific items I want, I write them down and order them first. Then I go to the “Bought Before” menu, and then just tick off the things I think I need without actually checking the pantry. Thus, there are some “essentials” that I have in bulk quantities and others that have nearly run out.
McGEARING UP
My friend Adele, who is in Europe, posted a picture on Facebook of clothes hanging out to dry. This prompted her friend Kenneth to recall the old song that goes “Monday is washing day, Tuesday is soup, Wednesday is roast beef, Thursday is shepherd’s pie, Friday is fish, Saturday is pay day, Sunday’s church ... is everybody happy? You bet your life we are.” I remembered the song but not the singer, so I googled it. I can now tell you that it was recorded by Micheal McGear and his band The Scaffold, whose other hits were Lily the Pink and the extremely annoying Thank U Very Much, which is often played during telethons. Never heard of Mike McGear? Well you may know of his brother Paul, who prefers to use the original family name of McCartney.
PARTY GAMES
This blog is non-party political, so I want to make it clear that what I’m about to write applies to all sides. A rather misleading bundle arrived in my letterbox last week. “How to vote safely” it says on the outside, with no indication that it is from a political party. Inside are a letter from the party’s candidate, plus two postal vote application forms and a return envelope that, as far as I can tell, isn’t an address for the Electoral Commission of Queensland. No political party does this as a civic service, they do it in an attempt to trick you into voting for their candidate. In this case, by using the word “safely”, they are also cynically leveraging community concerns over Covid-19.
Sad but true, all political parties have “dirty tricks” squads, where teams of people try to manipulate data and human nature to score an unfair advantage. If we believe in democracy, then we believe in a free election where all candidates make their pitch and the voters decide based on the facts and their own opinions. I applied for my postal voting form online at ecq.qld.gov.au and urge others to do the same thing.
LIKE, EVERYWHERE
Just when I thought I’d run out of places that are like other places, I was watching Michael Portillo’s Great Asian Railway Journeys on SBS last week and he referred to Singapore as the “Liverpool of the East”. So I went back to Google, to find that the nickname was inspired “partly for its shipping economy, but also for its Edwardian waterfront”. Perth, Australia and Athens, Georgia are both contenders for “Liverpool of the South”, apparently due to their music cultures. As for the “Liverpool of the North”, I’ve come up with Ottawa in Canada and Keflavík in Iceland. And the “Liverpool of the West” is Saint-Nazaire in France; Akron, Ohio; San Francisco, California, or Vancouver in Canada.
EVEN CURIOUSER
As part of the Brisbane Festival, Imaginary Theatre has created A Curious Arcade, which is said to comprise restored “story-telling machines” that were created a century ago by artist Celeste Mackellan and is on display at the Brisbane Powerhouse until September 26. The really curious thing is that the only references I can find to Mackellan, who supposedly mysteriously disappeared in 1929, are in relation to this event.
FEEDBACK
On the subject of board games, Jen writes: “I have been playing a lot of board games — and card games and video games — during the pandemic but have you noticed the really disturbing new board games for kids? There’s one where the aim is to avoid stepping in fake poo, another where you have to insert a strange device into your mouth that stretches your cheeks, and a game I will never buy that sees players squirted with toilet water. Nope. No, thank you.”
Regarding the timing of the evening meal, Jim wrote: “In Scotland I had two evening meals. One around 5-6pm and a supper at 10.”
On the trend towards prequels of popular TV shows and movies, David came up with Young Hannibal, Baby Cannibal, while Stephen suggested The Younger Ones. Brilliant.
Spencer (yes, that Spencer) also discovered why Bendigo is the “Vienna of the South”. It’s because of the architecture, apparently.